Enter horror film buff, sexuality educator, teaching artist, and Queen of Halloween, Shanna, who sits down with Dr. Timaree to discuss sexuality in horror movies.

So lock the doors, light a candle and settle in for one of my favorite podcast interviews of all time.

This jawn is 2 parts!

• Check out Part I here.
• Check out Part II here. Or head to iTunes to subscribe and hear podcasts even sooner!

All photos courtesy Clark Smith photography.

Questions? Comments? Violent reactions? Email sexwithtimaree@gmail.com See more at http://sexwithtimaree.com  and http://www.facebook.com/sexwithtimaree

Hear them open up about managing jealousy, the first “permissive events” they attended, and why even this incredibly open-minded culture can still hold inexplicable prejudices (single men and bisexual dudes, for instance).

Listen here or here. Or check it out on iTunes where you can subscribe to hear podcasts first.

Questions? Comments? Violent reactions? Email sexwithtimaree@gmail.com See more at http://sexwithtimaree.com  and http://www.facebook.com/sexwithtimaree

This weekend I was lucky enough to sit in on a meeting of the Delaware Valley Synergy in a gorgeous home in the suburbs of Philadelphia. This diverse group of people have one thing in common: open relationships.  All the people in this group are swingers, polyamorous or otherwise engaged in THE LIFESTYLE (as it is so often called). These are folks who believe that you can love more than one person at a time, be sexually active with multiple people while maintaining an emotional bond with only one…. or other incarnations of group sex.

I didn’t know what to expect when I met this group. It turned out they were happy, contemplative and awesome. And they are not unlike you. They experience sexual jealousy. They feel desperately insecure. They want to bang people who are not their current spouse. And they have learned, through trial and error, how to navigate the communication necessary for such an arrangement to work.

So listen in for advice on marriage, being real to your partners and acknowledging sexual tension in friendships.

Listen here: Delaware Valley Synergy Discussion or here. Or head to iTunes where you can subscribe to all the Sex with Timaree podcasts.

As always: Questions? Comments? Violent reactions? Email sexwithtimaree@gmail.com See more at http://sexwithtimaree.com  and http://www.facebook.com/sexwithtimaree

There is a whole sea of porn out there: some good, some bad, some vomit-inducing. But aside from being arousing one of the best attributes of porn is being hysterically funny. And making hysterically funny porn is what Brian Bangs of PopPorn.com is all about. His job is basically coming up with crazy ideas with his friends and then casting hot people to have sex in films that he directs and edits. You’ve probably heard of them, or at least some of their products, including porn parodies of  Jersey Shore, the Revenge of the Nerds, The Big Lebowski  and, of course: PRON: the XXX Parody. I had a chance to sit down with this genius to discuss how he got into the industry, the weirdest things he hears from fans, his favorite stars to work with and the novel idea that someone might spend their workdays in sexuality and still be a totally normal dude. And then he totally asked me to be in his next movie….

Check out the interview here. Or here. Or on iTunes.

As always: Questions? Comments? Violent reactions? Email sexwithtimaree@gmail.com See more at http://sexwithtimaree.com and http://www.facebook.com/sexwithtimaree

photo courtesy Kathy McLean/Solace Photography

Recently I was interviewed about partner negotiations on Sex with Jaiya.  It’s a radio sex education show where the co-hosts discuss their own sexual experiences, interests and issues. In this case, the lovely Jaiya and her partner D. Love discuss the common situation of one partner wanting sex more often than the other, trying to get your partner to try something new and the things that hold us back from honestly talking about what we want. I’m hilarious and helpful, obviously.

I enter the conversation about 16 minutes into the hour. Listen here!

Questions? Comments? Violent reactions? Email sexwithtimaree@gmail.com See more at http://sexwithtimaree.com  and http://www.facebook.com/sexwithtimaree

• If you had way less sexual experience than your partner when you got together, does your partner owe you threesomes so you can still sow your oats?

How can you get back on the monogamy wagon after slowly, but deliberately, falling off?

Hear the answers to these and other questions framed in some strange Oregon Trail analogies!

Listen here: Falling off the Monogamy Wagon. Or check out the iTunes store and search for Timaree!

As always: Questions? Comments? Violent reactions? Email sexwithtimaree@gmail.com See more at http://sexwithtimaree.com

And here are some inflatable clothes:

Not at all gay: topless dudes do gymnastics for the Pope:

Silvio Berlusconi, the Mussolini of Ass,  refusesto air this Renault ad on State television:

A Review of “Girl Crush,” a collection of Women’s Erotic Fantasies, edited by R. Gay.

There’s a perception that men are drawn to simple graphic, visual sexual images and women are drawn to stories with elaborate settings and complex dynamics between the characters. Whoever put this collection of short erotic stories together totally agrees with that… but they also like a good finger fuck.

Many of the fantasies spend several pages building up a back story that frames the relationship between the characters who will eventually end up banging. A couple of them are only cursory set ups, thin premises that launch immediately into hot action. My favorite of those would be “Good Neighbors,” a short story of exhibitionism, voyeurism, and three-way sex between near strangers. And unlike most of the tales in the book, it features some hetero banging. It sticks out in the book as being the most conventional porno flick storyline. You could actually jerk off while reading it.

On the other end of the spectrum, there’s “Call Me Cleopatra,” a lethargic 13 page tale of overly emo sentiment and no actual sex. It felt like I was a college professor, forced to wade through Intro to Fiction homework by a budding closeted lesbian. “I Told A Stranger About You Yesterday” also lacks any actual sex, which is surprising for a story centered around a visit to a prostitute.

The gist of this collection of “women’s erotic fantasies” is a literary tease: it provides fodder for your imagination to fill in details later. You read a story while waiting for the train, get a little turned on, and let it ruminate in your head for the duration of your trip home. By the time you’ve tossed your keys and purse to the floor, you’ll have developed a fully formed fantasy of your own that you can call back to when you’re having some “me time.”

The prevailing theme is girl-on-girl; but with few exceptions, it’s Lesbian Lite. Many (if not most) of the protagonists are self-identified straight girls- or at least first timers with Sapphic interactions. The novelty and first-time-ness of the stories could make a bicurious reader squeamish with delight but leave an out-and-proud dyke cold with the awkwardness. Maybe you’ll be pulled back fondly to the first time you had a girl-on-girl make out session and revisit that nervous dizziness of not knowing what to do.

Some of the highlights and lowlights:

-”Great Lengths” is the first story in the book and it sets the tone for the collection with a friends-turned hookup story that is neither romantic nor terribly erotic. Despite it’s porno-cliche domme, it’s fairly realistic, especially the resolution.

-”Skinny-Dipping,” a cute story with lots of slow, luxuriously descriptive story before the action. The sensory tension is built up with phrases like, “she flashed a smile- a shy curve of painted bronze that held a shimmer of mischief.”

-”Cut and Dry,” is another cute tease. It plays on our day-to-day fantasies where we see someone who drives us wild whom we can’t have. The women get to have a sensational hook up before quickly returning to normal so no one knows the wiser.

-”The Bachelorette” features great characters but entirely too much back story to be read as masturbatory fodder. One of many tales that features finger fucking as the ultimate act depicted but with allusions to the fun just starting as the story ends.

-”The Best Kind of Revenge” features a weird, un-relatable main character, BDSM as foreplay and a wild all-girl group “rape” scenario. It’s neither intimate nor particularly satisfying in the way that most power play fetish stories are.

-”Discovering Donnie” is a super long story of courtship that leads into a steamy hookup. From the outset it looks like a classic heterosexual set-up but includes a delightful and romantic twist.

Ultimately, the collection can be summed up by the editor of the book who comments in the intro that “girl crushes are all the rage these days” and “There is something very satisfying about a crush, about possibility.” This will tickle your bicurious fancy or add to your collection of lesbian erotica, but is not to be considered alongside meat-and-potatoes porn stories.

Questions? Comments? Violent reactions? Email sexwithtimaree@gmail.com See more at http://sexwithtimaree.com

Enjoy yourselves a spot of podcast. I answer the question, “are humans naturally monogamous?” and discuss the new book “Sex at Dawn.” To read more about this topic click here.

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Question to the Sexpert:

“A 6+ year relationship ended early last year, and recently i’ve moved toward becoming “official” with one person after spending a year on my own, exploring, etc….She’s very sweet and we get along great and we have a mutual friend whom i have always been very friendly/flirtatious, but nothing has ever happened. Lately they go out on weekends and talk about me….

I’m just wondering if this is dangerous territory for me, despite the potential awesomeness that could (and most definitely would) ensue. If this turns threesome-y, I want to know potential dangers, etc…I don’t need to do ANYTHING to make it happen, I’m asking you basically if you were me what would you do?”

As we all knew within 15 minutes of it being made public, Michael Jackson has passed on to the next stage of the game. It gives us an unparalleled opportunity to revisit his outrageously brilliant discography, for djs to demonstrate how poorly they can speak off script, and a chance for every third person on facebook to make a crack about how it makes sense he would die of food poisoning because it’s pretty dangerous to eat 12 year old wieners.

Ba doom chish.

It’s also a time for media to remind us of various nadirs in his plastic surgery history. We can see his nose slowly erode and his face melting from cute Black boy to fascinating anime character. While this opens up the floodgates for jokes, one has to wonder: What was he GOING FOR?

I mean, what was the goal? Was he just fucking around, trying things out, like a compulsive tattoo acquirer who ends up with a mess of unrelated ink up and down their back because they can’t just write out their angst in a diary like a normal person? Did he have a vision of where he wanted his cosmetic alterations to take him ultimately? Or was he just swinging in the dark at attempts to look “better?”

You may have gathered this ridiculously long non sequitur is an analogy. What’s your goal here? What do you want to accomplish, both in this potential three-way action and in your relationship situation in general? When you know what you want (and what you don’t), it’s easier to know when you’re headed towards danger.

You start your query with a quick intro into your relationship history, so that must have some importance to you. If so, I can tell you this group wildin’ out is a pretty sure fire way of guaranteeing you won’t date this main girl for very long. Obviously there are exceptions to this: I’m sure there are plenty of folks who’ve had a drunken orgy on a first date and went on to be married for thirty years but aside from that being awesome, it’s also mad rare.

Statistically speaking, relationships “survive” group sex and polyamory (multiple lovers) a lot more if they’ve already been in existence for over a year.

Why? Because it’s stressful on a number of fronts. You have jealousy to contend with, and even if you swear on a stack of Richard Dawkins books you don’t feel jealousy, it has an effect. You have to ensure everyone feels equally included, massage through the awkwardness of deciding if this is a one-time or regular event, hammer out ground rules of who can do what to whom and how, and then ensure with every fiber of your being that you won’t ever hold it against each other that the craziness went down the way it did. Cause stuff happens smoothly and organically in the moment that gets interpreted very differently in the sober light of day during a routine disagreement about who put the dishes away last time.

You: “Seriously, this is the third time in a row you’ve claimed it was my turn.”

Her: “Well maybe you should ask Whatsherface, since you came on her face and not mine. Maybe she can put the dishes away for you since you’re sooooo close.”

See? No one wants that.

But there are plenty of positives to be had! It’s a unique life experience, an opportunity to develop a very open communication line with your girl, it sets the bar high on sexual creativity, there’s the chance it’ll make you all better friends with a deeper intimacy, you can all learn more about yourselves and what you like, and the most obvious: it can be damn fun with a side of indescribable physical pleasure. Hard to turn down an offer like that.

My advice: trust your gut. Decide ahead of time what you want. Talk things through with the girls until you’re all sure you’re on the same page. Read more of what I’ve written on group situations here . Keep thinking, keep talking and be considerate of everyone involved.

Questions? Comments? Violent Reactions? Email sexwithtimaree@gmail.com See more at SexwithTimaree.com

Sexpert Timaree Schmit is currently finishing her doctorate in Human Sexuality, the culmination of a lifetime of prurient interests. She has worked as a sex educator writing for both academic and popular media for over seven years, and as an HIV Prevention Counselor, peer sexuality educator and adjunct professor. She was the founding Chair of the Human Sexuality Education Student Organization (HSEDSO) and is an active member of the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) and the Society for Scientific Study of Sexuality (SSSS). You can see more of her work at SexWithTimaree.com