Perusing an article about how Tiger Woods’ little Whoopsie Daisy moment(s) and how his affairs are distancing him even further and further from Black people, I couldn’t help but be struck by the weirdness. The man, after all, is mostly Asian. But when it comes to a minority group, one that must make identity a major issue in order to survive, you take heroes where you can.
Another minority group that comes to mind is, as always, the gays. LGB folks have to march up and down the place demanding to get the right to enter the sacred union Tiger so blithely tossed aside. And while it was probably his fame, athletic prowess and billionaire status (rather than his heterosexuality) that granted him the sense of grandiose entitlement one must feel to have not one, not two, but a whole harem of mistresses (10 at this writing), it’s another slap in the face of loving, committed couples who just fucking want to file their goddamn taxes together.
Then there’s the allegations made by some of his side gigs that he was only in the marriage for the façade, along with the latest leaks about his attempts to buy some more time with Elin. It appears the guy never really wanted to be married in the first place: it was the thing he had to so he could pursue the career he wanted and get everyone off his back.
Because that’s what marriage is, both historically and to this day: an economic contract, a financial agreement between parties to secure a better position for both individuals and their respective tribes.
A friend of mine related a story from a documentary he had seen. He said the members of an indigenous tribe was taken to New York City (for some reason or another) and at one point was asked about marriage between same-sex individuals in their culture. They quickly replied that this would never happen, as marriage was for babies.
The openly gay New Yorkers assembled in the conversation were a little nonplussed: disheartened by this apparent prejudice but wanting to be good hosts. A tribesman noticed the reaction and quickly clarified the tribe did not, however, put rules on love.
And if two people wanted to be together and they were the same sex, that was totally fine.
And this is because the tribe understood the clear differentiation between marriage as a contractual arrangement and marriage as a union of souls in love. One is the concern of the governing body of a tribe (or a country) and one is a matter between two people.
What opponents of same-sex marriage fail to recognize is that their battle is hardly different from starting a legislative referendum to mandate that First Communion must be in 2nd grade.
What Americans are becoming increasingly aware of is the damage done to marriage by greed, selfishness and entitlement. It’s philandering, abuse and neglect that tarnish the beauty of a union of lovers, not both people having outies or innies.
At the very least, if Tiger Woods and his drama are in any way our business to discuss and we can draw any peace from this, he isn’t one of those hypocritical conservative jackasses against gay marriage. Golf fans, take note.